This guy is absolutely gorgoeus and he is really nice. I met him at our politics meeting and we got off with each other when we were drunk- I know that sounds bad but it was actually realy special. Apparently he is really shy and having the guts to approach me was a huge effort for him so I feel really special right now. I went on a date with him which went very well- I could be myself around him and we're both kind of dorky people into collecting different things which other people find wierd.
I am at home at the moment I feel like reading one of my Animorphs books but they are at my flat in Leeds. I am going to go on another date with him sometime next week and we are going to protest against the BNP together on wednesday.
I'm actually feeling happy right now- this is pretty wierd- haven't felt this good about myself for a long time.

I have been home from uni this weekend and I am looking forward to going back tonight. I have a psychology presentation on monday and I am lazy so I haven't done enough work for it. So I will just have to get up early in the morning to finish my research!
The two girls I am working with are really nice and seem like a good laugh. I have loads of work to do this week.
I am going to get drunk on tuesday night with the politics society and my potential friends. I have to keep smiling and looking positive all night though this time- I need to make a slight improvement on last week's night out.
I was just thinking about these anti- terror laws. I believe they do make a mockery of the whole justice system. The government can use them for their own purposes too-like when that pensioner was arrested under terrorism charges for protesting at the rise in council tax while Jack Straw was talking. The state can just call something terrorism or inciting racial hatred and hold someone for up to 14 days without charge- now thay want to extend it to 30! This is a beginning of a un-democratic state. About 230 people get killed by being struck by lightning in the UK per anum- that's more than the amount of people who get killed by terrorism in the UK per year. The government are using 'terrorism' as an excuse to fuck up our democratic state and get power. Tony Blair has to be seen to be tough or Labour will not get voted in again. I hate most polticians- most of them are corrupt bastards. And there is so much apathy about these changes in the law- that is worrying- if people can't be bothered to stick up for their own human rights and the rights of others then we are all fucked. Now muslims are being perecuted and not many people seem to care.
I heard this quote about the holocaust- I hope this is vagualy accurate- "They came for the gypsies and I did nothing because I was not a gypsy- then they came for the disabled people and I did nothing because I wasn't disabled- then they came for the Jews but I did nothing because I am not a Jew- They came for me and there was nobody left to help me."
It seems everyone has already forgot this quote- we live in a world where we don't care about other people.
We are all pretty fucked- whatever happened to human kindness and understanding.

I have nine piercings. They are only in my ears and my eyebrow at the moment though I might get some more done- I'm starting to get that craving again. I might get my belly button done because I am running out of room on my ears and I'm getting bored with just the current ones. I need more, more, more...
I first started getting piercings just before I turned 18. They are an addiction. I promised my self piercings as a reward to get through all the crap at college(I will tell that story another time). I also want a tatto one day and have a brief idea of how it will look. It will be on my hip and it will have a picture of a bird flying with the words- "Live Free or Die" written below". It is my goal in life to help those who are being repressed or exploited and this will serve as a reminder for me not to give up on my principles.

So I did go out last night after all. Me ,my mate (or potential mate) and her mate went clubbing- though I think they have a bit more stamina than me. She came over to my flat at 7.00 and we drank some vodka and oranges and I was pretty plastered by the time we went out at 9 ish.
Had a good night but I had to slow down a bit in the night club and just drink some water then I got a big greasy veggie pizza. I actually feel okay today- I am not too hungover.
There was that awkwardness of sobering up and getting quieter towards the end of the night. And also my mates mate wasn't exactly making a massive effort to be sociable but he was probably just nervous and awkward and he was also staring at my mates big tits and dancing with her VERY CLOSELY. They say they are just friends but I think they will get together.
I will post some conspiracy theory stuff soon. I seem to be getting a social life- I hope things continue like this- I am so negative, I always think that good things can't last- I've got to get out of this way of thinking.

I think I might be going out tonight and getting a bit drunk. I hope it works out because I texted someone and asked them if they're coming out and they haven't text back- but anyway- patience Vickie- she will text back when she has recovered from her hangover.
Anyway I need to explain my theory of everything.
There are three things that make the world go round, oil, gas and money. It is a myth that love makes the world go round. The western world remains rich and relatively safe and healthy because of stable economies and stable governments which aren't too corupt. It exploits the rest of the world through unfair trade ('free trade' is the correct term). I am an idealist who believes in fairtrade. However most western consumers do not know or care wether the products they buy are made by child labour or some other form of exploitation- often they do not want to know because they are afraid of change and afraid they will become 'different' if they learn too much about the world. It is much easier to be ignorant- I often wish I could just unlearn everything I have learnt about the world- I am starting to get really judgemental and am developing a conspiracy theory for everything. I sometimes believe everybody out there wants to 'get me' or exploit me in some way- when that is just not the case. If I'm not careful I'm going to see a conspiracy everywhere- like Michael Moore.
Tune in for my paranoi soon- that's all for now folks!

So now I have been at university/college for four weeks. I have finally started to make some friends but I am really scared because I haven't had any good friends since I was 12 because everyone's just let me down. I'm afraid it might happen again. I am really trying to stay positive but it's so hard because loads of people who I've met are already talking about how many friends they have and how much fun they are having and I just feel really sorry for myself basically because I hardly know anybody yet. I am also missing my family so much even though my parents really piss me off (another story). I have been phoning home every couple of days. I really don't know where 'home' is anymore- I don't feel comfortable where I am now but I don't want to live with my parents. I joined the politics society which has some potential friends in it. I just feel so lonely right now and I know there are lots of people going through this/ have been through this before and I really need some support- it is hard trying to be grown up.

Well what happened was I was upset because I felt like I'd been abandoned because everyone (flatmates) had gone out without me. I got a call off the lads later asking me if I wanted to meet them at the bar but I was thinking why did they leave without me in the first place? I got down to the bar and said hi to them but then I realised I was going to cry so I hid in the toilets for a while then went back to my room and locked the door. I hid in there all night and SOME of my flatmates were worried and they didn't know where I was. They got the security man to open the door and there I was. It was quite embarrasing actually, I felt a bit childish.
Now they all think I'm a bit wierd and the girls are really pissed off about it but I couldn't give a shit- they said some really nasty things about me when they thought I wasn't there- sad fucking bitches.

Yes actually I am pissed of because on wednesday night I was supposed to be going out drinking in Leeds with my flatmates. One of them then turned round and said "Get a taxi by yourself because there's no room for you in our taxis." I just went back to the flat and slammed the doors and threw stuff about and swore a bit and then I heard my other flatmate (who was staying in) bitching about me on the phone ("Vickie's just come in and she's really pissed off...") No words of consolation to ME or anything. Then on thursday morning I got a text saying "sorry about what I said I was plastered r u ok" which just made me even more pissed off- the girls think it is okay to treat me like shite and then it'll all be ok if they send a pathetic text- they couldn't even phone me in person to apologise.
I am going back to Uni on sunday night as well and I really don't want to have to face them or talk to them right now. They are seriously dragging me down. The word thoughtless springs to mind here but believe me- that is just an understatement.
I do actually intend to write about other things in this blog but I have just started uni and have bitchy flatmates to deal with at the moment so I need to get this stuff off my chest. I will be discusing some interesting issues soon- so please keep reading my blog.
If anyone has any advice on how to deal with 'difficult' flatmates I would like to hear from you. XX Vick

I have been feeling lonely as hell this week because I am missing my family (though I don't want to live at home again). I have also been really paranoid about wether some of my flatmates actually like me and I have come to the conclusion that they do though the girls have formed a bit of a clique so I have felt a bit left out on occasions.
They can also be a bit bitchy and patronising too. I don't think we'll ever really be 'friends' but I can get on with them which is something. I havereal horror stories). I think I'm just discovering the reality of living with people- some of which are very different to me and can be a bloody pain in the arse at times. I feel a lot calmer though no met a few nice people who I could make friends outside my flatmates so there is hope. Overall I think the first couple of weeks have been okay- (some people have some real horror stories).
I am starting to find my way around Leeds and getting used to people.
I didn't really have very good or close friends in College or school so I am finding it wierd now- a lot of people actually like me and respect me. I am starting to feel really good about myself again- I actually feel wanted! I was afraid I would never feel like this again.
I have a feeling that Uni is going to be the best time of my life so far. (-: